It all depends. Full metal jacket (FMJ) anything, 9mm or .45 will go through a perp, a wall, a girlfriend AND dog, etc.. Stopping power is all about the expansion of the bullet where the metal meets the meat. You want hollow points for home defense. Or you could even go with the old Lead wadcutters. But most of what you buy at retail stores will be FMJ if you don't look carefully.I've heard 45's are better than 9's for home protection because a 45's have a better chance of breaking up in a wall or perp, where as 9's tend to go through things, and on to something else.
I carry a Walther P99 stuffed with Hollow point S&W's but it's right next to my bed in a small gun safe when at home. Highly recommend it if you have kids. It's got finger grooves so you can put in the combination in complete darkness. I Love Guns :D